


Voices in Our Heads

by Alyeska_Writes



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, My Babysitter's A Vampire
Genre: F/F, Getting Together, M/M, Social Media AU, if you've read my au on twitter you know what's coming, you gotta buy him a rose :')
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:54:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26399746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyeska_Writes/pseuds/Alyeska_Writes
Summary: After the squipcident, Ethan just wants things to go back to normal.Well...not completely.
Relationships: Ethan Morgan/Benny Weir, Jesse Black/Rory Keaner (background), Sarah Fox/Erica Jones (background)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 27





	Voices in Our Heads

**Author's Note:**

> hi! if you're here from twitter, welcome! if you're not, this is the ending to a bmc x mbav social media i did on twitter, which you can find [ here ](https://twitter.com/CHILL_OUT_ETHAN) if you'd like to read it! but, if you're a Be More Chill fan, you probably already know where this is going :D

Maybe he wasn’t ready for this, and maybe Rory wasn’t either. People are staring and while some welcome them back, others avoid them. But you know what? That’s not so awful, is it? People are going to talk, but people do little else. And Ethan and Rory are in the exact same boat, and Ethan’s not alone, so this isn’t awful. This is…this is fine. And he means that, he really does.

Erica and Sarah wait for them by the doors. Sarah, with her bright smile and her pinkie linked with Erica’s, and both of them are beautiful, they are. Ethan couldn’t be more happy for them. And as Jesse finds them and links his hand with Rory’s (and he looks ridiculous in his boots, but at least he doesn’t need the crutches anymore) it seems to Ethan that everything feels…right. Balanced, even. His friends are happy, and, for the first time since he took that damn pill, so is Ethan.

Happy, but also…incredibly nervous. He doesn’t know where Benny is, and can’t wait to find him, but at the same time, he’s not sure how this is going to go. He tries to be careful with the rose in his hand, tries not to squash the petals, and Jesse visibly smirks when he sees that Ethan took his suggestion after all.

And they walk the halls, the five of them, and suddenly…it’s like the whispers and the looks are no longer there. Because Ethan has his support system, doesn’t he? He has his friends, and there is no longer a voice in his head, and…everything is going to be okay. He takes a deep breath, and he goes to his locker. And he can see the faintest smudges of marker on it, and he _knows_ for fact that there used to be…things. Things like what they said about Rory, but…everything bad is gone. There’s a get well soon sign, just like there was on Rory’s locker. And he reads the other messages with a smile. He recognizes _good friend,_ in Sarah’s handwriting, _puppy dog eyes_ in Jesse’s, _not a total geek_ in Erica’s, and in Benny’s messy scrawl? Ethan’s heart stops when he reads the word _Beautiful._

He promised himself he wouldn’t cry today. He did.

He opens his locker and he gets ready for class, and it all feels…normal. Normal, which never knew he missed. Just like he never knew that he’d missed Benny while his squip was still active. Funny how those two things are linked, huh?

“There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!”

And Ethan’s heart swells at the sound of his friend’s voice, and he turns around with a wide grin, and the rose is hidden behind his back, but he’s confident, he is. He has these ugly circuit-board scars that cover his back and extend to his arms, and he’s pretty sure that he can never see Benny in a leather jacket again (not that Benny even _likes_ leather), but Ethan knows that this is going to be fine. Everything will turn out the way it was always meant to, and he doesn’t need a voice in his ear to tell him what to do, or who to be.

“Found me,” he answers. “It’s good to see you, B.”

“You’ve seen me every day since you woke up, though?” Benny chuckles, but Ethan can see just a hint of understanding in his eyes.

“Yeah,” Ethan agrees. “I have.”

And Benny is his most favorite sight in the world.

“So, I was thinking—,” Benny starts, but Ethan reaches out, cuts him off with a hand on his shoulder, and his nerves are starting to get the best of him again, but he shoves them way down.

“Benny, I have something I need to talk to you about.”

“O…kay?”

Deep breaths. Chill out, Ethan Morgan.

“I know that…with the way I’ve been acting lately, the last thing I deserve is…forgiveness.”

“Ethan, it’s fi—,”

“It’s not, though,” Ethan insists. “I’ve been a real jerk. To you, especially. And I know the last thing I deserve is…even your consideration, but…”

He can do this. He can! Because he is his own person. Ethan can make decisions for himself. And he never should’ve tried to change who he is. Because he tries his best, he does. His best doesn’t have to be good enough for everyone, either. It just has to be good enough for himself. And he owes it to himself to do this, right now. So he pulls the rose out from behind his back, and he smiles when Benny’s eyes widen, and he laughs softly when Benny opens and closes his mouth in what seems to be his best fish impression.

“I remember what you said to me that night, and I know you do too,” Ethan tells him. “And, you see…there’s this guy that I’m totally into.”

“A…guy that you’re totally into?” Benny asks, as if it’s not obvious.

“Yeah, a guy that I’m totally into,” Ethan repeats, and laughs once more. “It’s you, stupid. Benny…will you go out with me?”

Silence, for a long while. Benny looks at the rose, he looks at Ethan, he looks at the rose. He opens his mouth and closes it again, and just when Ethan begins to think that all of this was a bad idea, Benny smiles.

“And any voices in our heads…?”

“I promise that they’ll be the regular kind.”

“Well, E, I think that me, and the voices in my head, have made up our collective minds.”

And Ethan’s grin is growing, and his face hurts with the force of it, but he can’t stop, and he knows where this is going because he knows Benny, but still, he asks,

“What do they say we should do?”

“I think all of us want to be your boyfriend, if that’s okay.”

A feeling like euphoria and relief all mixed together rips through Ethan’s core, and his shoulders sag with it, and he can feel the happy tears spring to his eyes, and he wraps his arms around Benny’s shoulders, and when Benny reciprocates with his arms around Ethan’s waist, it feels…right. It feels like…home.

“I think that’s more than okay.”

In the instant that Benny’s lips touch his, Ethan knows that the overused metaphors of ‘fireworks’ and ‘electricity’ are altogether inaccurate. He knows what it feels like to be shocked, and this…isn’t it. This is safety, and warmth, and comfort. And the voices in Ethan’s head are silenced, because Benny is here, and Benny is everything that Ethan needs in this moment.

_‘Ethan…you can’t get rid of me that easily!’_

And of any _other_ voices in Ethan’s head, the loudest one of his own. There’ll always be voices, there will. And they can yell, and hurt like hell, but he knows that he’ll be fine. And that’s all that really matters, isn’t it?

**Author's Note:**

> and that's the end! thank you so much for reading, and for all of those who followed my AU start to finish, ILY!!! it means so much to me, you don't even know.


End file.
